Kodak R.I.P. ~ An Interview With my New Camera

June 13, 2012

Interview with Arri ALEXA

Me: So how do you feel about the fact that you have contributed to the demise of Kodak. It is after all a company that has lived in the pantheon of Great Companies, great innovators.

Alexa: Well if I had time to think about it, I suppose I’d feel a little badly…

Me: You don’t have time to think about it! Have you no conscience? Kodak is the company behind the innovations that have made so much great art possible. Kodak is like, THE COMPANY that first let us shoot in the dark, produce indescribably beautiful images…

Alexa: I’ve been busy.

Me: So busy you can’t even pause to shed a tear?

Alexa: Well, I’ve been busy, I’m shooting a lot…

Me: Okay, well, moving on. Would you say that this is “the year that film died?”

Alexa: Never say die. I’m proud of what I’ve accomplished, and I can certainly achieve an image quality that rivals film in a general way, but there are still applications where film is going to reign as king for a long time. For example, no digital camera can match the resolution of 65mm or Imax. That stuff is just crazy.

Me: So you admit you’re not the greatest thing since sliced bread.

Alexa: Well…just better than 35mm for most situations. I basically shoot digital intermediate and it goes on these cool little cards.

Me: Yeah, the SxS cards. Tell me about those.

Alexa: Well I’m german, but I’ve always had a fetish for all things Japanese. They’re so cute, like little tea cakes.

Me: Okay…What’s your favorite color?

Alexa: I like pretty much all colors. Except infra red. Not crazy about infra red.

Me: According to Arri, you’re a “she.” Definitely not a “he.” Care to comment?

Alexa: Like any well-rounded personality, I’d like to think my yin and yang are in harmonious balance.

Me: Sounds like a diplomatic answer.

Alexa: I just don’t want to be fetishized.

Me: Too late.

(awkward silence)

Me: Tell me about your relationship with your parents. I hear you’re quite close.

Alexa: Being born into a royal family isn’t all fun and games, you know the expectations are quite high. My dad is a 435, and you know what they’re like. Really really tough. My mom is an ArriLaser, she’s more the sensitive type. So I get my looks from my dad’s side and I get my heart and soul from my mom’s side.

Me: What’s next for you?

Alexa: Well my younger sisters are all making their way in the world now, the M, the Studio, the Plus…I guess they’re carving out their own piece of the world. So my job as the older sibling is done, you know, blazing the trail and all that. I love my life and my work, so I’ll just keep doing what I’m doing.

Me: Any upgrades in the future?

Alexa: Oh, I won’t answer that. A girls’ gotta have her secrets.

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